At least that’s what my adviser said during our orientation today.
So day one of senior year has passed… and I can’t wait for another 204 to go by. Yes, cannot wait. When I wake up tomorrow, can it please be graduation day already?
I really feel so bad now. I know it’s just the beginning and nothing has happened yet, but I really don’t know how I’ll have to face another year. With these people. I know it’s the last, but… I really feel no emotions for those last-last things. I know I was just writing about how optimistic I was about how this year will go because it’s the last, but… no. Or maybe the blues are just hitting me right on this day.
I’m not classmates with anyone from my group, or from my friends from last year’s section. Nada. I wished so badly that since it’s the last, I might as well spend it with people I’d actually like to spend it with. People to go to retreat with, to cram that survey questionnaire project thing with, people to share the same green classroom with…
None of my hopes were granted. My brother kept on telling me it’s my fault because I’ve jinxed it, like how I was jokingly saying to Joy that our four consecutive years of being classmates would be put to an end, as our trip to Korea was the conclusion or end of the chapter. And it came true. And it had to be a good five classroom walk away.
Well, my brother says this is what I get for getting a good section last year… which might actually be true because I really had the best set of friends in my section last year (not classmates, but friends in the class). And like what I always tell myself, it’s not always you get the good things. But why this senior year?
I never really made a big deal out of teachers. I’m not one to judge them because of what the upper batches say or because of the rumors that spread around school but I’m not very happy with my set. I never really cared, because I know one can not be an absolutely terrible teacher, but…
There’s a new teacher in our batch. He is full Chinese, speaks Chinese, greeted a class in Chinese, and is willing to teach them Chinese. Aww lucky.
And he’s not my teacher.
That’s just one thing of the many that disturbs me right now. Something which might probably disturb me for the rest of the school year. Indeed, it’s shallow, very shallow… but I really don’t know why it makes me feel terrible. And now I’m trying to make things less serious for me by saying that, yeah, there’s a reason why that happened, maybe because he knows Fookien and not Mandarin… lol.
But why? I feel so sad right now.